Dating someone who has been through a divorce has its own unique set of benefits and challenges. Generally, a man who has been through a divorce or separation within the last year or two isn't ready to jump into a committed relationship. No matter the circumstances surrounding the ending of his marriage, he needs time to heal and adapt to his new reality, especially if children are involved.
Wondering if the man you're interested in is ready to commit? Here are 4 signs to look for.
1. Plenty of Time Has Passed Since the Divorce
As we've said before, the tendency after going through a divorce is to "rebound" into another relationship without allowing for proper time to recover. It is important for a recently divorced man to take the time to reestablish himself as a single person before thinking about walking down the aisle again. In fact, many relationship experts suggest that two years is the minimum amount of time that should pass before a divorced man considers entering into a committed relationship.
While some men may require more or less time than the recommended two years of singledom, the point is that it's important to allow enough time to elapse before entering into another marriage. Otherwise, the relationship may be doomed before it ever really has a chance to thrive.
2. Legal and Financial Issues Have Been Resolved
Starting a second marriage is difficult, but it can feel truly overwhelming when you throw financial and legal challenges into the mix. Divorce is expensive, and he may still be working through court and lawyer fees. Additionally, if he is paying to support his children or former spouse, it may be a while before he fully adapts his lifestyle and budget to accommodate the added expense.
For both his sake and your own, it is important to ensure that and legal and financial issues that were brought on by the divorce have been resolved. Not only does this provide closure, but it prevents added stress and possible future resentment.
3. Any Custody Issues Should Be Resolved and Working
If he and his ex are still trying to iron out a child custody arrangement that works for everyone involved, now may not be the best time for him to enter into a committed relationship. While it may be tempting to assume that his children will just adapt to whatever changes take place, the fact is that many second marriages fail because of issues with children from previous relationships.
If he, his ex and their children have found and adapted to a custody arrangement that works for everyone, you can be confident that your relationship has a great foundation.
4. He Has Moved On Emotionally
No matter how long he was married or what the circumstances surrounding the divorce were, he probably went through a time of rollercoaster emotions. The ending of a marriage may bring a whirlwind of guilt, relief, disappointment, embarrassment and more. He may have even gone through a period of time where he still felt that he was in love with his ex; at the very least, he didn't want to know about his or her current relationship status.
While these emotions are completely healthy and normal, it is essential that he has made his peace with the divorce. If he has moved on emotionally, you can be sure that he's ready to commit again.
If you are divorced or are open to dating someone who has been through a divorce, we have a dating site just for you. Our Divorced community is filled with individuals who are interested in finding new love and friendships. Signing up is free, so join our community today.