5 Tips for a Successful Second Date
Everything is going perfectly. You met the guy or gal of your dreams through internet dating and the first date went absolutely brilliantly. Now comes the second date and you are sweating bullets. It is still early enough in the relationship that even one bad date can ruin it, but all of the online advice is for first dates, not second dates. Don't fret. You'll do fine. Here are 5 tips to help you have a successful second date.
1. Admit Your Mistakes
If you did something on the first date that you retroactively realise was inappropriate or rude, admit it right at the start of second date, apologise, and promise not to repeat the mistake. It obviously wasn't something bad enough to prevent the second date, but you don't want it to be the elephant in the room. Be honest, contrite, and brief in your apology. Once you clear the air, the second date becomes a lot easier.
2. Show That You Paid Attention
A lot of sharing happens during a first date: favorite foods, favorite movies, hobbies you enjoy, etc. You both share that information in order to determine whether you are compatible. Once you determine that you are compatible, it is important that you don't promptly forget what your date shared with you. Show your date that you were truly paying attention by using that information to make a better second date.
This can be done many different ways. If you are setting up the date, you can suggest dinner at a restaurant that serves the type of food your date wants, for example. If you got asked out, you might try adding a few of your date's favourite songs to your iPod shuffle and then play those songs at some point during the date. Showing you paid attention will do wonders to ensuring a third date.
3. Bring a Gift
This is only your second date, so don't break the bank buying a gift. That is tacky and sends the message that you are obsessive. A small gift like a flower, a small box of candy, or a lapel pin is simple, but will be appreciated. Keeping in mind the previous tip, if the gift in some ways ties into something they mentioned from the first date, you will earn bonus good will.
4. Travel Together
Most first dates involve meeting at a mutually agreed upon location. That is definitely best for a first date. For a second date, though, an easy way to help build chemistry and trust is to travel together. If you are setting up the date, offer to drive, if you have a car. If you have been invited, ask your date to pick you up. If neither of you has a car, walk or take a bus to your date's house before travelling to your location.
One small note for this advice. While you should expect the date will go well, you should plan for a disaster. If you are driving, make sure your date has an alternate option to get home if everything goes poorly and they don't want to spend another second with you. Similarly, if your date is driving, make sure you have alternate transportation available.
5. The Most Awkward 10 Seconds Ever
You remember those awkward 10 seconds at the end of the first date? Well, they are even more awkward at the end of the second when you are standing at someone's door and you've built up a little more chemistry. There is no silver bullet to kill the awkwardness. The best bet is to assume that the date won't end with a smooch, but rather with a hug. If your date is smiling, say that you'd like to give them a hug. That opens the door for intimacy, but puts the power of how much intimacy in your date's hands. It is a classy move that is sure to win points whatever the outcome.