If you're like most singles, you probably invest most of your dating life into finding someone thatyou like. That alone is enough trouble, isn't it? Perhaps that's why it's so unsettling when you find someone that you enjoy spending time with, only to discover that your friends and family don't like them.
Keep reading for a few things to consider when your friends and family disapprove of your date, as well as what you can do to encourage harmony.
Why Can't Everyone Just Get Along?
There are several different reasons that your friends and family aren't as in love with your date as you are.
1. They're Jealous
If your friends and family dislike your new significant other, it may not be personal. They may be feeling jealous because you are spending less time with them and more time with your partner. While it's natural to want to spend all of your time with your boyfriend or girlfriend, remember to stay balanced. Your relationship with your significant other is important, but it is not the only important relationship in your life.
Side note: Make sure that you're not using your friends or family to fill in the gaps when you're between relationships. If they seem to resent your romantic relationships, it could be that they're simply tired of being used.
2. They're Worried about You
Do you tend to fall into one unhealthy relationship after another? Do you have a specific "type" that you're attracted to, but you keep ending up in a relationship that causes you pain? If this is the case, then there's a decent chance that your friends and family members don't share your excitement over your new relationship because they know that it may end in disaster.
3. They Know Something
Have you ever heard something less than flattering about a friend's partner, but you kept the information to yourself because you knew that sharing it could hurt your friendship? If your friend clearly doesn't like your date, there is always the chance that they know something about them that you don't.
4. They See Warning Signs
There's a reason that they say that love is blind. It's not unusual for someone in a new relationship to have impaired judgment when it comes to their partner. Though this may be a difficult pill to swallow, sometimes when your friends and family are not as enamored with your partner as you are, it may be because they see warning signs that you're missing.
5. It's Their Problem
That's right; sometimes when those closest to you don't like your partner, it means that there is a legitimate concern. Other times, it's their own problem. Maybe your friend or family member doesn't have anything in common with your significant other. Perhaps their personalities just clash, and even though they can learn to be civil with one another, they're never going to be best friends.
Disappointing though this may be, it's actually okay. It's nice when other people can see how wonderful your partner is. It's nice to have your decisions validated, even when it comes to your personal life. However, the important thing is that you're in a healthy relationship with someone that you really enjoy being with. Hopefully in time, everyone will learn to peacefully coexist.
Keeping the Peace
If you've found yourself in a relationship with someone that your friends or family members don't like, consider these three ways that you can keep the peace.
1. Hear Them Out
Yes, it's your life and you're entitled to date whomever you want. However, keep in mind that your friends and family love you. If they have reservations about your romantic relationship, it's probably out of concern for your well-being. Keep the peace by hearing them out.
2. Consider the Source
Is it just one person that has a problem with the relationship? Is it everyone? If you trust that those closest to you are good judges of character, then it may be best to really consider their reservations. After all, they may have a clearer perspective than you do.
3. Give It Time
Sometimes it just takes people time to get used to a new relationship. If you're confident that your friends and family members just need time to get to know your significant other, then just wait it out.
Think that they might have a point? Consider branching out your search by trying online dating. At Love2Date Singles, we make it simple to connect with other singles in your area who share your interests, goals and background. Signing up is free, so create your profile today to get started.